Getting married can be one of life's most joyous occasions, but it also involves a lot of give and take. The first few years of a marriage tend to be rocky, as it is a transition period when each partner is trying to define his/her role from "me" to "we".
After the pre-wedding excitement and anticipation, many couples tend to find themselves, disappointed and distorted by the realties of married life. The letdown is very normal and most of the couples experience some form of "post wedding blues". The fact is, no matter how well or how long you know someone, the daily routine of living together often takes people by surprise.
Even couples who have had a live-in relationship prior to marriage tend to find it difficult to cope up with the new adjustments and compromises. Unfortunately, there exists no secrets to martial bliss and the only thing you can do is communicate willingly and frankly with your partner.
If at any time you or your partner feels that you have a hard time communicating with each other, it's a dangerous sign and you are advised to get premarital counseling. It's never too early for a relationship to give it the time and attention it deserves, especially so if it helps ease the transition from marriage and reduce destructive conflicts.
The popular cliche "marry the person, marry the family" has more to it than most people care to accept. Even couples who did not share strong ties with their families earlier tend to find themselves fighting over how involved they want their families to be in their new life.
Always keep in mind that marriage brings with it an exclusive set of issues, experiences and values. Try to be sensitive to your partner's feelings, expectations and needs and let them know that they always come first.
One of the common causes of friction in marriage is money; each partner tends to have differences in volume of spending money. Many couples prefer to keep their fiances separate. Common household expenses such as food are paid through a joint account while personal bills are maintained separately.
This method allows each person to maintain their financial independence and eliminate arguments. However, this is not recommended as it often builds a wall of mistrust between the partners. Although managing your finances can be the least romantic part of a marriage, it is an important constituent in which both partners must be involved in.
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